As most of you know, I lived in Australia for about three years from 2007 to 2010. During that time we quickly learned that pizza in Australia is not very good. The focus is on the toppings. Pile as many toppings on as you can while ignoring the quality of the crust or sauce.
We ordered from Pizza Hut a few times and it was ok. I still get their spam emails and lately, they've been scaring me.
A few months ago, they announced this frightening beast:
That's right...they stuffed the crust with hot dogs. This one actually surprised me a bit because hot dogs aren't actually a big thing in Australia. They lean more towards actual sausages instead.
I checked with my Aussie friends and they all agreed that this was a bit much. None of them had any plans to try this freak of nature.
Well, the creative minds at Pizza Hut in Australia just took it to the next level. Their latest promotion is for this:
Cheeseburgers. In. The crust. Why? How? Who on earth would ever want this? I keep hearing the line from Jeff Goldblum's character in Jurassic Park in my head: "Your scientists were so preoccupied with whether or not they could that they didn't stop to think if they should."
This is clearly a case of something that shoudln't have been created. There are some other blogs out there breaking down the pretty obvious nutritional hazzards of this mutation. No need to go into that here.
The part about these two horrifying "pizzas" that cracks me up the most is the fact that Aussies think of Americans as overweight, gluttonous slobs. They claim that we are all fat and that our portions are too big.
At least we didn't unleash this frankenfood on the world, though I fear that it may invade the US by this summer.
We just keep getting closer and closer to Taco Town.